In our busy lives, it can feel that trying to find time for ourselves can actually be stressful!
It’s wonderful to be able to live in the moment and carve a space and time to make sense of the world, yet it is not always as simple as that. In a constantly noisy world, we all need some peace.
Inner Peace and Outer Peace
In my work, I listen to people, help them reach their beauty goals and advise on the cosmetic and skincare products that can take them there.
I feel that looking after your skin is similar to looking after you mind. For example, having a regular routine, eating properly and exercising and keeping life simple can work for our skin and inner peace as well, it’s all about the how’s and when’s. If life just doesn’t give us the time to do all of it, that’s ok, maybe we don’t need to do it all to have it all.
It’s not one size fits all – find your rhythm
There are many different ways to achieve a state of peace and it can be highly individual thing.
Some of us are morning people, some are definitely not! We each have an internal biorhythm and it makes all the difference once you tap into that and work alongside it. Certain things might work for you better at different times.
There can be a beauty around being still and listening to your body and what you’re receptive to.
Others only thrive on chaos and activity, spinning multiple plates in the air and buzzing around on adrenaline. That’s perfectly fine too, in fact, the stillness drives them insane.
As long as it gets you where you want to go, you do you boo.
Spinning multiple plates at the same time works until one of them falls off and then the whole thing becomes a disaster. If you’re only spinning one plate you have more chance of succeeding, getting it done properly.
Pacing ourselves is looking at what we really need, when we want it and how we can get it.
It’s setting a rhythm and timescale that works for YOU, dancing to the beat of your own drum so you can tackle real life in real time, with less stress.
Setting a steady pace is a type of mindfulness because it involves shutting out extra layers that frankly bring stress and tension. Pacing means figuring out how to get things done without losing your mind, prioritizing each situation individually rather than simultaneously.
Stay in your lane
We may look at some of those people whose lives seem perfectly put together and marvel at how organised they are. In fact, this is often an illusion – you can’t see what is happening backstage as it is just a performance.
Let’s not look at them and focus on ourselves instead. That’s one massive stress factor out of the way already.
Are you the hare, or the tortoise? Which style helps you get to the finish line? That’s the key. To finish, no one is looking at your time, except you.
Let’s train your minds like you train your body
Often the concept of rest is made to feel like something you do either when you’re so exhausted or when you’re lazy. We could do with normalising rest, as a way to improve performance.
What if we thought of life as a sport? Elite athletes build rest days into their training programmes. They work hard and rest hard, giving their bodies time to recover in between sessions. Why don’t we do the same with our minds? Why don’t we build in time to pause time to reflect time to think?
If that sounds indulgent until you realise that if you do constantly run on autopilot without any pauses, eventually things go pear-shaped in a big way.
Fail to plan, plan to fail
Some of the things we think we can do in a day are simply fantasies. We have to try and keep things real somehow, because when life is life-ing, stuff can take longer than we imagined.
Now that only becomes a limitation if we allow it to be, so let’s remove those barriers and create our own timescales. Obviously we can’t control everything, but those areas where we can pace ourselves in a way that works, are for us to hold onto fiercely. Find the time or make the time.
The change of seasons is always a good time to reflect and renew, our bodies adapt to these external changes and that is very healthy.
Can you squeeze an extra 20 minutes into a day? Can stuff be dropped, delegated, delayed?
It’s amazing how much time you can fine if you really look, but it takes work and consistency.
Maybe the pressure of our own expectations (or other people’s) that is adding extra weight to our minds. Let’s drop that weight. Pronto.
Switch off or switch on
Switching off can be a walk in the park, just being in fresh air, sitting quietly, listening to music who knows? Dial down the noise in your mind so you can think clearly, even just for a short time. Come up for air. Take a rest. Chill for a few minutes.
Switching on can be finding space to address or face a key issue or important issue in your life, without distraction. Zoom in on it and reflect on it. Be about it and stay focused until you solve it.
Use the switched on or off time to look for inspiration – listen to music, a podcast or find something to to take you out of your own head. It’s like switching off but actually you’re tuning in – concentrating on something that isn’t you which makes for a good healthy pause which will leave you refreshed.
Journal or reflect on how you feel which you move away from the every day and zone out. Does pausing help you be more productive? Is it restorative? Do you feel energised? Or not?
Allow yourself to get it wrong and play around with pacing and ways to be until you find the winning combination. There is no tick like for solving all your problems, so be flexible where possible, there are no rights or wrongs.
Enjoy watching someone else’s journey but remember we are all unique so it’s fine to do it differently.
If they find peace standing on their head and you want to take a long bubble bath, it’s all good!
It’s all about finding your speed and your happy place. Whichever way you can.
Article by Nana Mensah